“Journey into the kaleidoscope of technology. Da Vinci is on the monitor. Dive into Supernovas. Nebulous and mysterious. Chrome fires with laser beams. Fireworks in a rainbow of colours. True and blue, but bred red! Across galaxies of space and eons of eternity – we’re sure getting cooler all the time!”
Welcome to Trash City. On behalf of the citizens of the urban sector. I’d like to show you around. Our itinerary is not for the faint of heart or the weak of soul — hang onto your heads, your stomachs, and any other parts of your body that you wish to…
Right, enough of the pseudo-intellectual hogwash. Hello. Unaccustomed as I am to writing for public consumption, it is up to me to write this damn bit to introduce you to the ‘zine, but not having done this sort of thing before, I’m at a loss for what to say, and have to resort to the two hunks of garbage above. What ARE you supposed to say to people you don’t really know, but who have handed out hard earned money for your ramblings? Aren’t you supposed to say something that will make them think it’s been all worthwhile? That’s the conventional way…
This is NOT a conventional ‘zine though. Inside you will find a lot of text, on a wide variety of subjects, some pictures, a few press clippings, and so on. The one thing that links them all is that I find them at least slightly interesting. Why am I inflicting them on you? Boredom mostly! I am currently tied down in a very boring job (in a stockbrokers — Yawn!) and I needed something to keep me amused. Since starting work, I could feel my individuality slowly ebbing away — this is my fight—back…
However, it’s not JUST me. It’s helped a few of my workmates avoid being mutated into yuppies, and I’d like to inoculate a few more people, so if YOU don’t care about Porsches, Filofaxes, CD players and would rather read the Weekly World News than the Times (if you’ve not heard of the former, don’t worry — you soon will have!), this is for you. Free your mind and your ass will follow!! Get in touch – write me a letter, an article, a story! You’ll be doing me a favour and yourself too [Pretentious, moi?].
[Hey, nearly 2/3rds of the way down the page – isn’t this editing lark easy?] A quick plea. We need contributions for next issue, or you’ll end up getting more of the same. There’s more about this later on, but I’d especially like a few contributions from the fairer sex – you may notice as we go on a certain ‘masculine’ bias in the articles. This is for no better reason than it is a bit difficult to produce anything else with an all—male editorial team!
A few thanks. Steve, Per, everyone at work (even the stockbrokers!), my parents, Doug (subscriber #1), the Holmes Bros, the Scala Cinema, the Virgin Megastore, God (for supporting Arsenal) and anyone else who helped.
Ho hum, ten lines to go. Time for some more of the pseudo-intellectual hogwash I think. See you on the other side for Aphrodite incarnate.
Jim McLennan, the Head Ed.
“All aboard! The journey to Trash City — the start of the third millennium – is about to begin! The countdown is on. The time-bombs are ticking away. Our quartz movements ignite. We’ll soon be going up and down & back and forth in the raddest scenes. Past the pulse beat of new life and new trends, avant—garde, Old Wave, No Wave in a fireworks display of desire”