Borderline Cinema

The following contributed article isn’t standard, cheery TC fare, but I think it needs to be printed. I print it in the form it was received, with minimal changes to punctuation and text. The contributor wishes to remain anonymous. You have been warned.

There has been much debate in these pages, and in the film & comic magazines, about censorship, certification, and the damage done to material by ‘censoring’ offending bits (for example, the razor blade sequences in “Hellbound: Hellraiser II” or the ‘flip you’ in “Repo Man”). It is very difficult to agree on the grounds for cutting or even if there are grounds, if the integrity of the material suffers.

At least, that is how I would have summarised things yesterday. Yesterday, I could not conceive of any material being COMPLETELY unsuitable for viewing. There is a world of difference between foul language / exploding latex heads and the video I saw last night. It is one thing to see Leatherface chew hippies with chainsaws. This is special effects, clever editing, acting, FANTASY. It is quite another to witness the real thing.

I know what you’re thinking: I’ve been there! You’re thinking that you can handle it, that you’ve seen just about everything and that you wouldn’t be distressed. Wrong. I discovered that I couldn’t imagine the real thing. I’ve never witnessed anything stronger than violence on TV news. But to actually see such monstrous acts performed on a living human in front of the camera? Are you beginning to understand me?

I watched a woman beaten and tortured until she wept. I saw her raped with objects designed to cause intense pain. I looked at her, cowering in the corner, shivering and crying. That was 10 minutes into the film. My notes stopped with the words ‘Shit, this is for real’. I felt like I was riding an emotional roller-coaster – I couldn’t get off and was powerless to intervene. That I was fascinated by the total lack of respect for human life is an indication of it’s ‘power’. It’s ‘purity’. It’s hate. After they had beaten, humiliated and disfigured her for life, I had to deal with the realisation that the people who took part in it are really sick fucks, probably beyond help, and the rest of us must ABSOLUTELY be protected from this.

My apologies if I glamourise this in any way; it was genuinely appalling and whatever language I use to describe it can not do my horror justice…

[ I recall seeing something similar myself once; to be more accurate, 25 seconds of it before I realised what it was and hit the STOP button. I wanted to watch on, and try to find some evidence it was all a sick joke – I don’t think I’d have found any.

The whole thing brings up quite a few points that deserve to be answered. Where is the line between ‘acceptable’ and ‘unacceptable’ violence? I can handle most things, as long as I know that it didn’t ‘really’ happen – I’m quite happy to cheer when people get torn apart, be it by zombies, hooks on the end of chains or demons – but anything that smacks of reality, and I’ll sit in stony silence. I remember seeing on the news, footage of Israeli soldiers taking boulders and using them to break the legs of Palestinian demonstrators. That shocked & frightened me far more than just about anything I’ve seen on video or film.

The closer something gets to reality, the worse it is. I don’t find psychos with masks on stalking girls entertaining, because such things HAPPEN. Rape scenes, no matter what the context of them, give me no entertainment at all. REAL violence of any sort has a very good chance of making me reach for the off switch.

All of which gives the lie to the much repeated statement that watching violence leads to a ‘desensitisation’ in some way. True, it diminishes the appeal of the same thing, but ONLY on screen. The ‘peeled body’ in “Hellraiser” was shocking; by the time “Hellbound” appeared, it was ‘oh look, a peeled body’. It is, as mentioned above, an astonishingly different thing to see it for real. I don’t think there can be any justification for showing REAL violence on REAL people as entertainment.

From here, it’s a short step to the taboo subject of snuff movies. The general standpoint of most genre publications is that they don’t exist. The 25 seconds I saw were fucking close. If there’s anyone out there who has seen one, and STILL feels that censorship is a bad thing, I’d like to hear from them – complete anonymity will naturally be preserved.

Apologies if any of the above is a little incoherent. It’s not an easy subject to talk about. I, too, felt that there was nothing more that could shock me, that I’d seen it all. It was only by accident – I was given the wrong tape – that I came across the film at all. The brief glimpse I had of it left me, for the first time ever in my life, NEEDING a drink. It was BEYOND anything even my imagination could come up with. Nightmares, from which I’d wake up shaking, and fumbling for the radio switch, were amateur in comparison.

There can be no excuses. To watch such a film proves, beyond all reasonable doubt, that you are sick. Not even the ‘release’ argument holds good – people who need such a channel for their energies don’t need an outlet, they need help. Certain things do not qualify as entertainment. The deliberate infliction of pain on unwilling human beings is one of them, and it has no place in the splatter genre, or in society as a whole.

Devo Music

One thing that is sadly missing from the music scene today is a sense of humour; everyone takes it all so seriously, there no longer seems to be room for fun. Is there any act now to compare with Devo?

Who? Fair enough – they are perhaps one of the most neglected and misunderstood bands to have managed to fill venues as large as Newcastle City Hall. They’ve met with critical incomprehension and public ridicule due to their mode of dress (‘flowerpot’ hats & yellow jumpsuits) as well as their bizarre philosophy.

The Devo story began in the early 70’s in Akron, Ohio. Two sets of brothers, the Mothersbaughs ( Mark, Bob & Jim ) and the Casales (Gerard and Bob) were the initial members, though Jim soon left to be replaced by Alan Myers. They produced a complete mixed-media and lifestyle package; music, videos and the theory of ‘De-Evolution’, based on the idea that mankind was actually reversing the process of evolution through increasing reliance upon consumer culture (Devo followed this theory by releasing increasingly commercial/sanitised LP’s, culminating in the ‘E-Z Listening’ discs; Devo songs done in Musak/supermarket music style). Their latest release, ‘Now It can be Told’, marks something of a return to basics and is perhaps the better for it.

Helped by David Bowie, they record their first LP with Brian Eno at the controls, and ‘Q: Are We Not Men? A: We are Devo!” was released in 1978, when punk had taken root in the psyche of both Britain and the US; indeed, Devo described themselves as “the fluid in punk’s enema bag”. An extraordinary achievement, unlike anything recorded before, the highlight (and near hit, reaching no. 41 in the charts here) was a robotic version of the Stones’ “Satisfaction”, which bore little or no resemblance to the original. This catapulted them into the spotlight, especially in California and New York, where they appeared on the infamous ‘Saturday Night Live’.

Since then, they’ve released seven studio LP’s, plus three live ones (though since one of these only had one side, and another comes in at under 18 minutes long, it’s probably nearer two!), gradually, as mentioned above, becoming more synthetic. Commercial success here has always eluded them, though ‘Whip It’ sold over a million in America.

The best way to appreciate the Devo ideology is to see their videos; “We’re All Devo!”, out on Virgin for 9.99 or occasionally available for rent, contains many of their best songs from the first five records and also stars some of the weird personalities that inhabit the Devo world; Rod Rooter, the sleazy record exec brought to it’s obvious extreme, Dr Byrthfood, their ‘creator’ (played by acid guru Dr Timothy Leary), General Boy, commander of the Devo army (in reality, the Mothersbaugh boys’ father!) and Booji Boy, a mutant doll-faced peculiarity who acts as Devo’s mascot.

Their sense of humour is rather odd. They got into Major Trouble with their record company for ‘forgetting’ to mention that the lyrics to one of their songs were taken from a poem by presidential assassin (failed) and one time president of the Jodie Foster fan club, John Hinckley Jr. “I desire / Your attention / I desire / Your perfect love / I desire / Nothing more or less” it went, and Warner Bros had to pay royalties to a crazed gunman. The Devo contract was not renewed.

Basically, there are so many aspects of Devo that it’s impossible to cover them all. Their habit of covering famous songs in their own style ( not only ‘Satisfaction’, also ‘Are You Experienced?’, ‘Working in a Coal Mine’ and “Don’t Be Cruel’, to name just a few ), their ill-fated church which fell through due to death threats (it was another example of their sense of humour – they’re all atheists), an LP of Devo imitators, film soundtracks (they had a track on the ‘9 1/2 Weeks’ album, though oddly enough not on the UK release of the film, due to copyright problems I think) – all combine to make up one of the most amusing, interesting and, quite frankly, astonishing bands to have come out of the United States.

YouTube Video

Devo-ography

Albums

  • Q: Are We Not Men? A: We Are Devo!
  • Duty Now for the Future
  • Freedom of Choice
  • Devo Live
  • New Traditionalists
  • Oh No! It’s Devo
  • Shout
  • Total Devo
  • Now It Can Be Told (Live 3-sided LP)

Videos

  • The Men Who Make The Music [crappy sub-VHS quality embedded above!]
  • We’re All Devo

Film appearances

  • Rock & Roll High School
  • Heavy Metal
  • Dr. Detroit
  • 9 1/2 Weeks
  • Pray TV

Many of their LP’s are now available for 3.99. As a special Trash City offer, and to encourage you to try them, if you want to send me a blank cassette ( C60 or C90 ) and an SAE, I’ll put together a sample tape. What have you got to lose?

Linnea Quigley – the ultimate bimbo?

In a deliberate move, this article does not contain any pictures of the lady in question. If you want that sort of thing, buy ‘Slaughterhouse’ – Trash City is a clean, morally uplifting publication, and will do nothing likely to encourage readers to practice self-abuse. Can we get into W.H.Smith’s now, please? [2020 update: fuck that shit. Bring on the pics!]

“I like her in tight-fitting clothes that are real revealing. But I’d rather have her out of her clothes. And so would the crew.”

—- Dave DeCoteau, director.

Over the years, there have been several contenders for the title “Queen of the B’s”; Caroline Munro, from the Hammer stable, Sybil Danning and Linda Blair have all been claimants to the throne. However, if you were to carry out an opinion poll, the probable winner would be Iowa’s finest, Linnea Quigley. Born in Davenport an indeterminate number of years ago – though she doesn’t discuss her age we do know she graduated from high school in 1976 (her yearbook pic is above); I’ll leave it up to you to do the arithmetic. Her family moved out to sunny California where Linnea, after a brief spell as a model (following her graduation from the John Robert Powers Modelling School), entered the acting profession courtesy of Charles Band, who selected her to appear in ‘Fairy Tales’ (though there seems to be some discussion as to whether this was her first film, or whether ‘Summer Camp’ or “Don’t Go Near the Park” came first).

Since then, her career has consisted of appearing in a long series of otherwise instantly forgettable films with her contribution usually being little more than to take her clothes off at the slightest excuse (having had to watch these, I can testify to the mind-numbing awfulness of some of them!). The budget of these pictures is very low by Hollywood standards, usually less than a million dollars and sometimes sinking to figures like $175,000 (“Creepozoids”) or even lower. How has she managed to become such a cult figure given these factors?

Charisma has certainly got something to do with it. Having had the privilege of meeting her briefly, I can tell you she does have a certain ‘presence’ (the other thing that struck me was her size [height, perverts!] – I’m not tall, and she barely came up to my chin, even in high heels). Her continuing devotion to the genre has won her fans too; unlike certain actresses we could mention, she hasn’t moved onto ‘better things’ and tried to disparage her early efforts.

She doesn’t make a fortune out of her film-making. As bimbos come, she’s pretty cheap, being only paid union rates, and the low end of the scale at that. This is about $1300/week, worth bearing in mind if you’re making that low-budget picture, though I’m not sure whether that includes food and transport.

You’ll also have to be aware of Linnea’s taboos. Oddly, and perhaps contrary to what you might have thought, she doesn’t do full nude scenes. In “Return of the Living Dead”, she wore a flesh coloured ‘prosthetic device’, which left her looking even more like a Barbie doll than usual. Nor does she do anything involving cruelty to animals, which means she might not be the best person for “Debbie Does Dobermans”… Space prevents a full description of all of her films, as we managed for Nastassja – Linnea is a busy little bee and churns pictures out at an impressive rate. There is also a SEVERE problem with titles; many of her films have appeared under a couple of names or more and there are also occasional projects announced which never manage to see the light of day, for whatever reason. Thus, the list has been divided into two parts: the first section is ‘confirmed sightings’ while the other half is a collection of ‘maybes’ to keep an eye out for.

  • 1978
    FAIRY TALES
  • 1979
    GRADUATION DAY – ‘Friday 13th’ style clunker also starring Christopher George which involves members of a high-school track team being bumped off (pic, above)
    SUMMER CAMP
    DON’T GO NEAR THE PARK (aka Nightstalker) – this one made it onto the DPP list of video nasties. A potential future Incredibly Bad Film, it resembles a school production – “There is not one single aspect… that could possibly be rendered any worse” — Greg Goodsell.
    STONE COLD DEAD
  • 1980
    STILL SMOKIN’
  • 1981
    CHEECH & CHONG’S NICE DREAMS – this and the previous one are both ‘comedies’ starring Cheech and Chong, two Americans who spend all their time stoned. Might be funny if you’re in the same state.
  • 1982
    THE YOUNG WARRIORS – Bizarre teenage vigilante thriller also starring Ernest Borgnine, Richard Roundtree and Lynda Day George.
  • 1983
    THE BLACK ROOM
  • 1985
    SAVAGE STREETS – Shock! Horror! A surprisingly decent pic, with Linnea playing Linda Blair’s deaf-mute sister, who is raped, causing Linda to go after the attackers. The British version has a lot of nudity and violence cut, yet still has a low-life nastiness that bites. Probably her best bit of acting to date.
    SILENT NIGHT, DEADLY NIGHT – Mundane slasher pic that achieved a certain amount of notoriety after being withdrawn from circulation, chiefly because of it’s use of Santa as a psycho. Linnea is one of his victims, impaled ( topless, natch! ) on a set of antlers.
    RETURN OF THE LIVING DEAD – Possibly the movie she’s most known for, this remains one of the few films to successfully combine horror and comedy. Linnea plays a punkette with some odd ideas about death – her idea of fun is doing a strip-tease on a tombstone, prompting the immortal line “Trash’s taking her clothes off again!” (pic, below).
  • 1987
    NIGHTMARE SISTERS – written in six days, filmed in four. Enough said.
    TREASURE OF THE MOON GODDESS – shot in two chunks. It started off in Mexico, and was so bad (having a director who spoke only Spanish didn’t help) it was shelved for two years before eventually being finished in the Philippines.
  • 1988
    CREEPOZOIDS – Made in fifteen days, this post-holocaust remake of ‘Alien’ without the frightening bits lacks the humour that’d justify the bad FX. A group of survivors are picked off by a genetic experiment; Linnea is the second last to get killed. tho’ she takes a shower first. If a nuclear war would stop films like this being made, I’m for pressing the button now.
    THE IMP – (aka “Sorority Babes in the Slimeball Bowl-O-Rama”)
    HOLLYWOOD HOOKERS – (aka “Hollywood Chainsaw Hookers”) this was made over two weekends on a budget rumoured to be as low as $80,000, by schlock-meister Fred Olen Ray. Blood and nudity in equal (large) measure, courtesy of some chainsaws and Linnea respectively; the latter is a chainsaw-worshipper, wearing little apart from a snake tattoo, which took six hours to apply. Ah, how the artist must suffer.
    NIGHT OF THE DEMONS – (aka “Halloween Party”)
    DOCTOR ALIEN – (aka “I was a Teenage Sex Mutant”) High bimbo quotient, a decent script (by Ken ‘Metamorphosis’ Hall) and good performances, especially from Judy Landers in the title role lifts this ‘aliens-turn-nerd-into-sex-machine’ movie above the average, even if the end sucks. LQ’s role is fortunately negligible; she barely says a word and just takes her top off instead.
    VICE ACADEMY
    AMERICAN RAMPAGE
  • 1989
    ASSAULT OF THE PARTY NERDS

A SELECTION OF UNCONFIRMED SIGHTINGS, ALTERNATE TITLES, PROJECTS IN PRODUCTION AND OTHER POSSIBILITIES.

TantalizerSex BombDeadly Embrace
Blood NastyPsycho in TexasHauntings
Space Sluts in the SlammerSorority Succubus SistersAmerican Gigolo
Nightmare on Elm Street IV

I don’t REMEMBER seeing her in the last one, tho’ I wasn’t really looking!

Linnea Quigley’s Knockers

[Sorry, couldn’t resist that one!] Let’s be honest and admit there are certainly people who don’t like her and will have read the previous pages through gritted teeth. The case for the prosecution:

10 THINGS WRONG WITH LINNEA QUIGLEY

  1. She’s too short.
  2. Her ribs stick out too much.
  3. Her lips.
  4. Her hair.
  5. She looks generally grotty.
  6. She works more than Barbara Crampton.
  7. She believes her hype.
  8. Her husband worked on a film in South Africa.
  9. The films she appears in.
  10. She never pulled that lipstick back out from inside her breast.

A sense of chivalry forces me to Linnea’s defence. The first five, dealing with her appearance, probably come down to personal taste; she IS small – I don’t regard that as a problem. Never really noticed her ribs much – normally when they’re visible, so are more, er, interesting things. Her lips don’t seem at all abnormal, though I must admit her hair does resemble an explosion in an asbestos factory. The second five are a little more objective; a few more Barbara Crampton films would certainly be good to see and it is probably true that there are millions of better looking bimbos who CAN act out there.

Eight may well be irrelevant and isn’t her fault anyway. Nine, well, alright – unlike Sybil Danning, who can drag an otherwise appaling film up to acceptable (“The Howling II”) by sheer power & charisma, the best movies LQ is in are good for reasons other than her presence. And can I have an explanation of number 10, please? It’s clearly connected with ‘Night of the Demons’, where she did screw a lipstick into her nipple – beyond that, I’m at a loss…

I could certainly have reviewed more of her films, but after having watched the ones I did, I ran out of interesting ways to say ‘this is a total waste of time and those responsible should be fried in batter’. Space is TC is short enough without wasting it on low-budget movies with no originality just because an average-looking bimbo is in them. I MIGHT, I stress MIGHT, review some more next issue. Oh, sod it, I’m off to watch ‘Passion Flower Hotel’ again…

Thanks to Just, Richard Owen, Steve, Mark Stevens & Glyn Williams for their help in writing the preceding pages. All incoherencies & inaccuracies are mine…

Welcome to the Videodrome

Trash City very nearly followed in the finest traditions of fanzines everywhere this issue, by Being Late. The main reason for this was the holiday I took in September, though actually I had allowed for it – what I hadn’t allowed for was that when I came back I realised that most of the stuff I’d written beforehand was unusable…

Another problem was the Linnea article, mostly because I was faced with the task of watching eight or so of her films over the course of a weekend, which left me with a rather jaundiced view of her. I nearly junked the whole idea but decided to leave it, so you can see how my opinion of her deteriorates through the article…

Then there was the week spent sitting in the Scala, when they had one of those weeks where I HAD to go six nights out of seven… Not to mention the new toy I bought – an Atari ST computer, theoretically to help with TC, but there are more fun things to do than read through desk-top publishing manuals… I’m still trying to get the balance right between time spent writing and time spent putting it all together – yet again, it was out with the axe as I end up with too much text.

On the plus side, Steve came up with the long-awaited comics piece. The cynics among you might say it was more than mere coincidence that after waiting six months for it, I got the first draft less than a week after an ‘interesting’ photograph of him was taken…

A few words on the debacle of last issue, when two pages from a draft copy slithered into the finished version, leaving a lot of people wondering why I thoght Dario Argento directed ‘Demons’. Fortunately, that one was caught before the second edition was sent out, though if there’s one thing worse than stapling ‘zines, it’s unstapling them to change a page… Some people wondered about my sanity, saying they wouldn’t have noticed the minor error; the crux isn’t whether YOU knew or not – I knew, and that was enough to make the hassle worthwhile. Plus, I couldn’t have stood getting twenty letters pointing out the error…

‘Bad Taste’ opened in the cinema, with much gloating in the genre about how stupid the BBFC had been to let it through uncut. A little counter-productive – I feel we ought to applaud them for realising the nature of the film and encourage them to do so more often. Better to have the people with the scissors on our side!

TC4 will be our first anniversary. I’ll have to put my thinking cap on and see what I can come up with to commemorate the occasion; a competition of some sort perhaps? A colour cover? Depends what the TC piggy-bank holds – don’t expect TOO much…

“It is better to burn out than to rust.”

Contents

We regret to announce that, due to a shortage of train crews, the page numbers for Trash City 3 have been cancelled. We apologise for any inconvenience caused. [Well, if British Rail can get away with it…]

1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
9.
11.
13.
15
17.
The Cover
The Info
The Contents
The Editorial
Linnea Quigley – The Ultimate Bimbo?
Trash Pop
Borderline Cinema
The Mail
The New Avengers
Film Blitz
At long last, the bit about Comics!
Incredibly Bad Film Show
Trash Literature
The Lists
Nightmares in a Damaged Brain
Politics
The Section with No Name
Trash for Beginners
It Must Be True…
The Back Cover
25.
29.
32.
33.
41.
43.
46.
47.
49.
52.

The editor does his penance

“Demons was directed by Lamberto Bava, Demons was directed by Lamberto Bava…”